Confronting Our Attitude

Life's Like This — To some, life is a breeze and for others it's just one head wind after another. Facing storms and challenges in life is simply, part of life. Many of us wish that we could avoid them altogether, that they would chart a course in a direction that steers clear of our personal lives and all the people we love and care for. But as we grow older and life unfolds, we quickly come to realize that the lessons and challenges of life are not for a select few — everyone must have their share of them to contemplate, to wrestle with, to try to make sense of, and to try to avoid again in the future. While it sometimes seems that others live lives that are free of many of the obstacles you or I are forced to confront, life does not discriminate — it doesn't matter if you are rich or poor, the challenges of life are sure to unfold and must be met regardless of our wealth or social standing. How we meet the challenges we are confronted with will often dictate their outcome and the impact they eventually have on our lives.

Life And Consequences

Life’s Like This — We all know that there are consequences to any action we take. What we do can set into motion a series of events that may continue long after we’re gone. Unfortunately, when we are making a decision most of us think only of the immediate consequences. These are often misleading because they are short-lived and seemingly only impact our present condition in life. In many areas, however, the consequences of our actions or behavior can last a life-time and be a constant source of irritation. The consequences that result from our actions can be a wonderful learning resource that we can use to develop personal growth and character formation, but for that to happen, we need to embrace the lessons that life is trying to teach us. When we are able to do that, those lessons in life, while difficult to go through at times, can be a source of strength and encouragement for us.

Warning Signs of Toxic Relationships

Life’s Like This — Sometimes we so desperately want someone in our lives to love, someone to share our hopes and dreams with, so much so that we ignore red flags that keeping popping up to warn us that something is wrong with the relationship we are in. Our quest for love is normal; we all want to be loved and to love others, but when the relationship we are in shows signs that it is unhealthy, when signs and symptoms start to reveal themselves, then we may actually be in a toxic relationship. There is a popular notion that love conquers all, that no matter what the difficulties are, if you pour all your energy and efforts into your relationship then the problems will resolve themselves. In truth, not all relationships are salvageable. When a relationship turns toxic, a whole new sense of awareness needs to come into focus so that the emotional, physical, and mental health of the non-toxic partner is protected. One only has to read reports in the various media to know that there is evidence of toxic relationships; reports that have led to increased divorce rates, accounts of domestic violence, and tragically even death. The topic and seriousness of these types of relationships is very relevant to our society and possibly to yourself if you are in a relationship that shows signs and symtoms of toxicity.

Choices and Responsibility

 Life’s Like This — It isn’t often in life that people are willing to take responsibility for their behavior despite the potential of negative consequences. I find it refreshing to hear stories of people that do just that; people who are willing to do the right thing no matter what. We all have to be responsible for our personal behavior and how we interact with others. Responsibility is part of every facet of our lives, and an important test of our character is how well we fulfill our responsibilities, not only to ourselves and our family, but to society and God.

The Art of Being Gracious

Life’s Like This — It is never too late to learn how to be gracious. While Christmas has now passed, the opportunity is before us to reflect on how well we were gracious to our family and friends. The art of being gracious should never be lost or forgotten. The dictionary defines gracious as being pleasantly kind, benevolent and courteous. Over the holidays we have numerous opportunities to practice being gracious. It may come while hosting a party for friends or while you hosted your family for Christmas festivities. It may even come as a guest at a party. So, what does it mean to be gracious? The art of being gracious is all about how you make the people around you feel. Imagine going to a party or family gathering and finding yourself ignored or made to feel un-welcomed. Whether it was intentional or not, when you find yourself in the company of people who are not gracious, it leaves a bad taste in your mouth. You may even find yourself not wanting to be in that person’s company again. That is how profound an impact an ungracious host can have on you. The flip-side is when you are ungracious toward others. They, in turn, may have second thoughts about inviting you to their party or wanting to be in your company again. So, what are the characteristics of a gracious person?

Expression of Gratitude

Life’s Like This — gratitude is a precious gift that, as I once read, can be “…medicine for the heart.” I am struck by that statement because I believe it rings true in so many of our interactions with people. Imagine a world where you never heard an expression of appreciation for something you have done? Imagine a Christmas morning where family members are unwrapping their gifts and not one word of thanks is expressed? Imagine working for years at a job and at your retirement, there is no recognition for your years of service? These are just a few of the countless instances that afford each of us opportunities to give the gift of gratitude.  
 
The amazing thing about giving the gift of gratitude is that it costs you absolutely nothing but a few moments of your time. So why does the expression of gratitude seem to be a fading virtue in our society today? Is it because people are too busy to say thank you? Is it because people have become so self-absorbed with their own thoughts or interests that they simply dismiss the importance of expressing gratitude. Or, is it because people have gotten in the habit of taking people forgranted and then come to expect something without giving anything in return?  
 
I should point out that the giving of a gift, be it your time, present, or act of service should not be predicated on whether or not you receive an expression of gratitude. If you have that expectation, you are sure to be disappointed. But wouldn’t be nice if you did? We all want to be recognized in our life for something we have done. I once read a book by Dr. Gary Chapman, called The Five Love Langauges. This post isn’t a review of that book, but it is a fantastic book. You can learn more about The Five Love Languages by clicking HERE. I wanted to point out to you what those five love languages are and how at least one of them relates to the expression of gratitude.

Facing peer pressure and the consequences

Sometimes in life you can find yourself in a situation where you are given the opportunity to learn a life lesson. When I was on the DMZ of Korea, way back in 1969, I learned a lesson in accepting responsibility. I was 18 at the time, in many ways naive, and simply unwise in some of the choices I made. I was a medic for the 2nd Battalion, 9th Infantry Regiment, “Keep Up The Fire,” of the 2nd Infantry Division. I was serving as duty driver for our unit physician on the day I violated two new directives that were each punishable by an Article 15, a form of non-judicial punishment. I found myself in this situation because I allowed peer pressure and the notion that I wouldn’t get caught to influence my actions.